Thursday, April 14, 2016

Evelynn's Scrapbook

In 8 days it'll be 4 years since my sweet Evelynn was born, and 10 days since we had to say goodbye for now. I have been saying for the past almost 4 years that I need to get her scrapbook started, and of course, then finished. Back when I did Liams scrapbook it took me a little over a year to finish his. Although it was still hard to work on, the drive to have it done before Evelynn was born helped me to get it done. I don't recall exactly when I started her scrapbook, but it took me a very, very long time to get anywhere with it. So many baby stickers bought and cute scrapbook ideas that I found, once again never got used because those things don't seem to work with how this scrapbook was going to end. I even started once and ended up ripping multiple pages out, only to start over. I just wanted it to be perfect for her. When I finally started making real progress on it, I did everything from before her birth and then the funeral on. I just couldn't bring myself, until probably the last 3-6 months, to really go through her pictures from birth, and even then it was (is) still hard to look at those nicu pictures. So, like Liam's, I needed to take pictures of the whole scrapbook, just in case something were to ever happen to it, and of course to share her beautiful life with all of you.

I can't believe its been almost 4 years since you were born. I miss you so much.
 Love you forever baby girl

Monday, February 1, 2016

Adoption Journey Update 8

Sorry it has taken me so long to update, but thank you to a recent commenter, I realized I need to just take the time and share what has been going on with our family and little miss Ruby these past few months.

We got Ruby's birth certificate a few months back, way sooner than we expected. We then immediately applied for a social security card for her so we could have that all finished by the end of 2015.

The nursing has still been going pretty well. For the most part I can keep up with her on a daily basis, except for when she decides to cluster feed. A few of the moms in one of my mom's groups also gave me a bunch of milk, which was really nice to have.

It's hard to believe Ruby will be 6 months old in 2 days. She smiles, coos, has an adorable giggle when tickled, and rolls over. She loves her exersaucer and loves looking at herself in the mirror. She doesn't care for a pacifier, but loves her thumb, and is all about putting anything else she can find in her mouth. We are working on trying to get her to sit up but she seriously hates to bend at the hips. She is also not a fan of tummy time. I see it being awhile before she starts crawling. We see the pediatrician on Friday and then we will start solids. She is really long and skinny, no teeth yet, and her hair seems like it is always changing color. For a long time we swore she was turning into a red head, but then other days it looks very light blonde, almost white, other days a dark gold color, and then back to strawberry blonde. Her eyes look to me like they are almost a grey color. She's such a beautiful baby girl and we love her so much.

I got our first letter in the mail from our adoption agency last week about sending out our first update. I didn't know this but I have to include a letter on how Ruby is doing. With that I also have to send at least 10 pictures of her. I still keep in contact with her birthmom, mainly by text, but have mailed her almost every picture I have taken so far of miss Ruby. She sends me messages every so often asking how Ruby is and I'll occasionally just send her a picture. I am glad that we have this contact and hope it continues. I have never had any contact with the biodad, so I hope he likes the pictures I send and the update on how Ruby is doing.

Here are some pictures from the last few months. Since we got Christmas pictures, I probably will wait and do 7 or 8 month pictures instead of getting 6 month ones done. I am not sure when I'll post next, as the kiddos have kept me quite busy, but thank you to everyone who has given so much support and followed along through the adoption process.

I love this.

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Adoption Journey Update 7

As well as a 2nd birthday party and adoption finalization party in one

August 25, 2015- Social worker came for post placement visit. The state of Alaska only required one.

August 26, 2015- One of my mom groups through a sip and see for us. It was so sweet. I cried. I still have a hard time with the idea of baby showers, but this was really nice. Also, makes it a lot easier when the baby is here and alive.

September 30, 2015- Court date for finalization. Ruby is officially a Rasmussen!!! That night we had a party for both Max and for Ruby. A 2nd birthday party for Max and an adoption finalization party for Ruby. Of course, it was train themed and the cake was strawberry flavored with reddish frosting. Red for Ruby and also red for adoption. The girl who made it did an amazing job. If you look closely you can see all of our kids are included on the cake. A boxcar with a sign for toddler crossing. A boxcar with a sign for baby crossing. And then a boxcar with a sign for angels crossing with l's and e's on the boxcar to represent Liam and Evelynn.

October 2, 2015- Got our paperwork in the mail saying the adoption was fianlized and that we can expect to get the supplemental birth certicate in around 12 weeks. Once we get that we can finally apply for a birth certificate.

Train cake for Max. Red for Ruby.

Thank you to pinterest for this cool idea for our train themed party.

My big boy on his actual birthday (Sept. 26).
The perfect gift found on etsy for our birthmom.
A necklace for her and one for Ruby.
A Ruby as the stone versus her birthstone.
2 months old already. Such a happy baby, and love those dimples.

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Ruby Is 6 Weeks Old

Well, 6 weeks and 2 days.

After living out of a hotel room for almost 2 weeks with her it's hard to believe we've been home with this little beauty for over a month already. Things have been going okay. Max has been having a fairly hard time though. He's clearly very jealous and I think he also hit the terrible twos stage, along with some teething going on. I suppose that's to be expected. So, we've had some rough days, but I am so grateful they are both healthy.

Here are some picture of my sweet girl and our family. Does anyone recognize the pink tutu and headband? That's right, it is from our Evelynn bear, and I think Ruby looks darling in it. And can you believe Max is almost two?!

Monday, August 17, 2015

Adoption Journey Update 7

I apologize again for not getting a post, or just a short note, letting you all know things were okay out sooner. I had wanted to wait until all the papers were signed before I made any big announcements, just in case. Then, once papers were signed I just kept saying that I'd post something tomorrow, which I obviously ended up never doing til now. Here is a short, well kind of long, look at our adoption journey after baby was born.

Baby Ruby Evelynn was born on August 3, 2015 at 1:42pm. She was 6lbs 11oz., 18.5 inches long, and had a full head of blonde hair. Our birthmom did great and I am so grateful she let me be in the delivery room. When the dr had broke her water that morning there had been meconium in it which can cause the baby distress and lead to infection and even pneumonia. Because of this there was a pediatrician and nicu staff in the delivery room to assess baby at birth. Once born they were able to suction a lot of the meconium out of her lungs right away but said she was having some breathing issues and would need to go right to the nicu. I was so panicked but I was also so glad that she was induced that day because I can't imagine how much worse it could've been had they waited til she went into labor on her own.

I headed down to the nicu shortly after Ruby was brought there to see how she was doing. The pediatrician told us that by the time they got to the nicu she was doing remarkably better, so they decided not do the xray afterall and said that she didn't even need the cpap. They still wanted to monitor her for a couple hours though and wanted to give her all her shots before they would let any of us hold her or release her from the nicu.

In the state that we adopted her from it only had a 12 hr relinquishment period, but since Ruby wasn't born until the afternoon our adoption lady wasn't going to come in the middle of the night to get signatures. So, when Tuesday morning came we were so eager for the adoption lady to come. We waited and waited and waited some more. Ruby had been in with her birthmom most of the day, except the feedings and that we had her in our room overnight, so Dereck and I had to just sit in our hospital room alone with our thoughts, and we were going crazy with fear. I thought pregnancy was scary waiting for a baby to be born alive and healthy, but let me tell you, waiting for the birthmom to sign the papers is a real mind f#÷&. Her husband, who wasn't the bio dad, and her mom were all trying to convince her to change her mind. We were certain we were never going to get to see her again. Finally, at about 3:30pm our adoption lady came in and said the papers were signed. Our birthmom even put Ruby Evelynn on the birth certificate. So, when everything's official all we would have to do is get her last name changed to ours.

We left the hospital shortly after the papers were signed and moved close to where the agency was, about an hour and a half away. We just needed a release from the agency stating that we were Ruby's power of attorney and a letter from the agency stating that the hospital can release her into our custody. We went to the adoption agency the next day, on Wednesday, and signed our section of the adoption papers. Ruby's bio dad went into the agency office on Thursday and signed his section of the paperwork. From there on out we just hung out at our hotel waiting to hear when our court date was and also when Juneau had received and signed off on ICPC. A week later, on the 12th, we finally had court. There we met with the lawyer and a judge. We were able to do this now so that we don't have to come back for the official court date for finalization on September 30th. At that time the lawyer will stand in for us and Ruby will officially be ours.

Also, on the 12th we drove back to the town Ruby was born in and met up with our birthmom and her family so they could spend a bit of time with her before we left town. It was so evident how much her and her family loved Ruby. I am so grateful that she chose us and says she made the right decision, but we feel for her. We know far too well what it is like to leave the hospital empty handed. We assured her that we will not disclude Ruby from her life. We have each others phone numbers to keep in contact and can send pics via text message. Also, part of the legal agreement is that we send her and the bio dad at least 10 pics every 6 months the first 2 years and then once a year after that. We will send her all the pics she wants, directly to her even, if that's what she'd like. I think and hope we will always have a good relationship and that Ruby will always know who her birthmom is and knows that she loves her.

We finally got the call on the afternoon of the 14th that the ICPC paperwork was approved by Juneau, which meant we could finally go home. We got plane tickets for the next night, the 15th. Exactly 3 weeks to the day we left, we were finally home.

As far as the breastfeeding goes, well, it's not going as great as it did with Max. I ran out of domperidone a few days after she was born. Since things went so well when I breastfeed Max, I just assumed I wouldn't need to be on it after she was born and started nursing. Well, I'd also say that the stress I felt during the hospital stay didn't help. By day 3 it seemed I already couldn't keep up and we had to supplement with formula. Now that we're back home it'll be easier to work at getting it back and I'll get back on the domperidone for another month or two. The good news is that she doesn't seem to have any nipple confusion and latches on great, so hopefully it won't take too much work.

She is such an amazing little baby and we love her so much. And today she is 2 weeks old. Our family will always be incomplete without our sweet babies Liam and Evelynn, but I will say that it seems a lot more balanced and incompletely complete now that we have our boy and our girl.

Thank you everyone for all your support on this long journey of ours to grow our family. Here's Ruby, isn't she fabulous?!

I also just want to say now before anyone decides they want to comment anything along the lines of "us saving her," or anything else of that nature that I hear far to often from other adoptive families. I even already had a fellow blm from one of my loss groups say that it's just so sad that her mom didn't want her. Maybe in the case of some adoptions that can be said, but in the case of ours, it is far from true. She loved her so much that she wanted to ensure she had the life she knew at this present time she couldn't give her. If anything its a very brave and noble thing to do.
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